"Concert in the Old School Garret"
Half a century
Since anyone as much as touched this piano. Let it sing again As it was made to yesterday.
Phantom hands that strike softly or that thunder
The forehead of this man heavy as the heavens before it rains.
And the springs
Under the weight of excitement, forgot to squeak
Half a century it is since anyone as much as touched this piano.
Our good friend Time
Sucked each figure empty like a honeybee
That has lived long enough
And drunk enough honey
So that now it can dry out in the sun somewhere
Under the closed eyes, another person sits
Under the closed eyes, he seeks among the keys
As among the veins through which the blood flows softly
When you kiss them with a knife and put a song to it.
And this man yesterday cut all the veins
Opening all the organ’s stops
Paid all the birds to sing
To sing
Even though the harsh fingers of the sexton sleep heavy upon us
Bent in his manner of death, you are like Beethoven
Your forehead was as heavy as the heavens before it rains
-Anonymous
Hello Andrea, here are some things I like, and some constructive criticism.
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I had the same poem, we both had very different views on what the poem was about. I looked at the literal meaning, while you looked at the emotional and mental meaning. I believe you showed the author's feelings very well in your butterfly, you decoded lots of figurative language in the poem and made it into images. Such as the black bystanders, and the Jewish key that was locked away.
Your perspective on the poem differs greatly from mine, but I do enjoy the way you conveyed the message of the poem. With the Nuremberg Laws sign, it helped show that the Nazis were controlling them, like you said they did because of the fingers of the sexton. Personally, I thought that meant that the man playing the piano, but this explanation gives another, darker meaning to the poem. This dark twist does show the dark life of Jews during the Holocaust age.
Personally, I couldn't decode this line from the poem, "as among the veins the blood flows softly", but I thought your view on this line was very emotional. It showed how people committed suicide just to be free from the hell they were in, which I thought was a very well done paragraph.
The pictures on the butterfly sort of coalesce into one big picture of pain and a feeling of oppression. I really enjoyed how you put it together.
Dislikes-
There are many places that could use tags, such as the bloody knife in the corner, and why you added the swatstika. There is also no explanation for the words in german (the black and green ones). If you could add a tag which explains why you added them onto your butterfly that would be great.
Overall, I believe your butterfly and tags were structured very well and you kept to TIQA format. There isn't a lot of constructive criticism since I generally thought your butterfly was a good one. Have a good day.
Hello Andrea, I recently knew that we have the same poem for this important project and can I just say, your project is amazing. Your thoughts and your explanations made drawn into your poem because your wording is very explicit and well thought. I was able to understand little by little of this poem, but thanks to you, I was finally able to complete those missing thoughts. The hands on the side of the butterfly made me have a connection with the poem when it mentions about the white fingers =, so very great job on that part, very well thought. I love the colors and pictures you chose because they relate to the lines of the poem which simply has a negativity mood. Though, a good advice would be to expand your thoughts and explanations to give a more explicit attention to other readers as well. Overall, your butterfly project is very well written and outstanding for this topic, you did an amazing job.
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